'Imagine The World Without You..'- Blog Readers Views On Life And Death

As I drove into the parking space at the Yaba cemetery, cold chills ran through my spine and my body hairs felt like that of some North American porcupine. I wasn't sure if it was the weather or the monument filled environment that was having an effect on me. It had been threatening to run all day but it was all a crazy mixture of thick dark clouds and little rays of sunlight. Some say an elephant is about to the born at such times (talk about some weord African mythology).



I pulled out the floral wreath and stepped down in my black tux. I made my way to the funeral place. It was the burial of the popular business mogul, Chief Bode. His family requested for a quiet ceremony with few friends and family. His son, Tunde has been my friend since childhood. I walked up to the coffin which now housed one of the country's most influential men. So powerful a man now reduced to memories of silent nights. I laid the wreath by his side, tapped my friend and whispered "Be strong bro" as I made for an empty seat at the back. Encomiums were being showered on him by friends and foes. Both the good things he did and did not do were extolled of him. You could feel the pangs of death amidst silent sobs.

"Hebrews 9:11 says 'And it is appointed unto men to die but after that is the judgement" The priest's voice rang aloud. Tunde bent his head as he tried consoling his mum and sister.

Beneath the whole James Bond show he was putting on, lay a bloodshot eyes hidden behind the dark shade waiting to pour out rain of tears like rivers of many waters. Memories of Chief flooded my memory throughout the sermon.

"In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth. Imagine the world without Chief Olubode Williams. Rest in the perfect peace of the bossom of our Lord Jesus. May we arise" The priest said ending the sermon as the choir sang the "Only remembered by what we have done..." hymn...

As I drove back home silently, a still voice whispered to me "Derrick, imagine the world without you. Would the world still be without form and void? Would darkness still be upon the face of the deep? Would the world be better off without you or would the world yearn for the spark of beauty you bring to it?"

Listen readers, it might be a fiction tale but the message is as real as you and me. What have you done to make an impact in your generation? Who have you influenced and who can say I own a large part of my life success to you? Away from the proud outlook, how does your life influence people around you? Everyone is talking about the government being bad but imagine your country without you? Would it be a joy not to see you destroy raw materials and vandalize properties yet not pay tax. Some are praying for Paris when they can't even pay for their selves. You expect the world to fall at your feet like you are some Da Vinci painting?

Just spare sometime today to imagine the world without you in it. Would the world cry out for someone like you or would the world throw a deathday shower to celebrate your nonexistence? Would you keep dancing in the dark and not let your true potential spring forth? This is a you thing. Find out your purpose in life and live your dream. Big shout out to Laila, without her, you might not have read this. Everyone has a world of his/her own. You have your world, I have mine. We all have our worlds, but imagine the world without you. Rule your world then you can rule the world... Imagine the world without you..

Derrick Chidumebi

A Girl is Pregnant for Our Heartbroken TILB Reader's Fiance

Hello Laila, please hide my email address. I am heartbroken. A girl is pregnant for my fiance. Though he wants the baby but he doesn't want to marry the girl cos she's a troublemaker and we are planning to get married next year... he has been begging me for days now but I'm just confused. The girl doesn't know his house.

What should she do?

Dear Nigerian Men, Would You Marry Your Elder Brother's Ex?

One of us, a TILB reader urgently needs your advice. Read her mail below:

Hello Laila, I met a guy only to find out that I've known his brother. I've only been with 3 guys in total and 2 of them are brothers. Nawa for this life o. Anyways I've been with his brother twice. The last time I had a hook up was January and it was with his brother. Only for me to meet this guy in another city and find out it's the brother. 

I like him a lot and he's gunning for a relationship that may lead to marriage. He has a good heart and God knows I don't even want to break his heart for him. Do I tell him at all, or do I tell him now or later? I'm so sad I could just kill myself right now.

Ladies and Gents, Is This Still Possible In This Day And Age?

This photo had me wondering if it is possible in this era where hormmones seem to control our actions.

Some people say they cannot be in a relationship without 'test driving' their partners, others blame 'konji' on their inability to be celibate. I even know a lady who says she can't go to a guy's house because they ALWAYS try to sleep with her.

Is the relationship pictured above possible?  Lets have your opinions.

"My Wife Beats Me Whenever We Have A Misunderstanding"

 I have being married for five and half years now and we are blessed with two children. We show so much love to each other, so much so that most people that know us usually wish to be like us, not knowing that each time we have misunderstanding, she beats me so hard and leave me with injury, and after reconciliation she will always say it was out of frustration and she will apologize but that does not stop her from doing it again.


I am tall, well built with six packs and very strong too, but I can not imagine beating a woman no matter what she does, and this has being my major problem because sometimes I will raise my hand to hit her but I just can't do it.

She does not want to see any female call me, and I can tell you frankly that I have never cheated on her any day. I don't even have reasons to do that because she is very good in bed.

This morning on our way to work, we had an argument, before I knew it she started beating me on steeriing.

Please I need matured advise.

Do You Agree With Damilola Attoh's Message?

Tinsel actress Damilola Attoh shared this thought provoking post on Instagram and captioned it  #Give them an inch and they will take a mile.


While i have my own personal opinions about corporal punishment, i want to hear what you guys think about Mrs Attoh's post. Do you agree with her?

Is It an INSULT to Ask a Lady for Salt when Eating Her Food?

My people see me see wahala.

 My guy won arrange low budget birthday - his new found babe, her friends and his. 5 girls 5 guys, the new babe bring her friends cook. 

We all dey dinning, the girl dish out food. As I dey chop the food, I no fit tell if it's sweet or not. I now asked the new girlfriend to please get me small salt. Though her face change small, but she smiled and went to the kitchen. 

After a while, the guy wey sit near me say, please pass me the salt, I give am. Then a girl said, please pass me the salt, I pass. Na so the salt go round. We chop finish, drink. I thank her for the food.

We later sit out, dey gist. My guy say him babe no happy say I embarrass am. I made it look like she no sabi cook in front of everyone. Ha! but you can see that as she bring the salt, everyone, every other person on the table used it except my guy. He say I for just bone chop the food like that. 

My people, is it a crime to ask for salt? Even the girl's friends used the salt.

- Osile 

A Question For Sexually Active Unmarried People

He is asking:

"Do you ever feel guilty after making love?


Because after I have made love I often have a sort of vague feeling of guilt or depression, or even disgust.

Do I have to feel this way? Is it normal?

I'm still single but I do have casual sex."

''What Could Be Wrong With Me?'

I seem to have this common problem with dating:

After a few weeks of talking, and/or one or two dates, communication ceases without warning. I would send a text message every few days wishing her well. If I call, the phone will just ring to voicemail. If I send any text messages, it will not be returned.

If this had just happened once, I'd quickly get over it. If the girl would simply tell me that she doesn't want to continue, I'd be okay with it. This cessation of communication has been from every single girl that I have talked to, and it has always occured in this fashion.

I don't know what is wrong with me, or what I'm doing wrong. It has gotten to the point where I fear that God doesn't want me to marry, or have a family someday.

Can anyone advise me on what to do?